Observing a scene play out between a waitress and an Indian family gives rise to reflections about emotions as a doorway to social and cultural intelligence.

 

 Emotional Social and Cultural Intelligence @ Indian [7:27m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

.::.

I love this Manifesto.

A lot of this is familiar, but I like how he has managed the principles based on the 24 Character strengths and virtues from Positive Psychology. Essentially Michael Lee Stallard describes how our individual efforts can bring about good organisational climates… I particularly like to include schools in this….

The bottom line is that connection plays a critical part in improving individual performance. People who are more connected with others fare better in life than those who are less connected. Connection, because it meets our human needs, makes people more trusting, more cooperative, more empathetic, more enthusiastic, more optimistic, more energetic, more creative and better problem solvers. It creates the type of environment in which people want to help their colleagues. They are more open to share information that helps decision makers become better-informed. The openness that emerges in a trusting and cooperative environment creates a robust marketplace of ideas that stimulates innovation.

This awareness campaign for the International Red Cross won bronze at the ACT competition last year. The idea behind the artwork is that everybody have the right to be treated as a normal human being. A healthy life is very important, compassion and tolerance is part of it.

“Every conflict around the globe, whether it’s between countries or cousins, begins when people disregard this (compassion) basic human emotion. Compassion helps us find common ground and overlook our differences by discovering that we all have the same colour blood in our hearts.”

Direct from very hard hitting osocio

What are the qualities of a President of the United States who takes on the mantle of leader? On the MSNBC program “Tim Russert,” Doris Kearns Goodwin, presidential historian, shared the qualities she feels we should be looking for in the President of the United States. Here are the qualities she submitted:

*withstanding adversity

*diverse perspectives

*loyalty

*admitting mistakes

*managing emotions

*defining goals

*knowing how to relax

Throughout the entire hour program it was evident to me as a emotional intelligence practitioner that she was primarily talking about emotional intelligence. In her discussion about “withstanding adversity” she talked of former presidents and the presidential candidates of 2008. The practice of optimism, resiliency, and perseverance modeled for others can bring energy and power to those they lead. The leaders have been “tested.” We know from the study of many leaders, they have had to withstand enormous obstables, “picked themselves up,” and went forward.

“Diverse perspectives” relates to how leaders learn from others, including from those with whom they disagree on many issues. A leader surrounding themselves with only “yes people” only hears their own voice and views.  They are not challenged to revisit their beliefs and perhaps even enrich their beliefs, if they are not listening to others.With a leader utilizing their emotional literacy, navigating emotions, empathy, and noble goals, really all of the EI competencies, this is when they truly are able to engage others in decision-making. Without engaging “diverse perspectives” a leader is not connected to the relationships they have with the people.

The attributes of “loyalty” and “admitting mistakes” can really be discussed together in that the loyalty that the President has for his/her people is shown most vividly when being true to oneself. Admitting mistakes in the work for the citizenry can show a loyalty that transcends any other work with which the President focuses. Most of the emotional intelligence competencies ring through these qualities.

“Managing emotions” so clearly relates to EI. We may call it “navigating emotions,” with Six Seconds Emotional Intelligence Network, but it really is the same. There are so many instances when the information gleaned from anger, frustration, sadness, happiness,  and joy can bring power, energy, and clarity to a president’s message. The job of the President of the United States is to be able to transform those emotions into messages that enlist, energize, and empower the citizens. Additionally, “defining goals” relates to “managing emotions” in that a president needs to use the data from their emotions and create a clear message that communicates shared purpose.

Lastly, being able to relax is an important quality for a president, as with any leader. President of the United States has almost an unequaled amount of stress in their lives. Taking the time for reflection, time with family, a sport, or perhaps a hobby is an extremely important part of the lives of any leader.

 I believe Doris Kearns Goodwin’s list is almost complete. I would definitely add empathy as another quality. She alluded to it many times in the program, but did not name it. It is clearly evident that emotional intelligence competencies are at the core of any leader, not just President of the United States.

A new study released in Applied Psychology found that people with a highly rational thinking style actually became more biased as the stakes went up.  The authors suggest that in an escalating situation, the highly analytical thinkers were less able to tune into the dissonance that would cause them to challenge their own assumptions.

In other words:  They ignored the feeling that they were on the wrong track.

The common view is that we need to be rational to make optimal decisions, but it’s just not true.  The last century has been driven by this paradigm and the results are clear - while we have incredible technical excellence, we are failing as a species.  My contention: “Analytical = Better” is one of the most pervasive and destructive myths of our era.

If wisdom is to be found, it is not within the paralyzing prison of logic alone.

Source: Kin Fai Ellick Wong, Jessica Yuk Yee Kwong, Carmen K. Ng (2008) “When Thinking Rationally Increases Biases: The Role of Rational Thinking Style in Escalation of Commitment,” Applied Psychology 57 (2) , 246–271  (Article Abstract)

After finishing the “Emotoscope” ap for Facebook I was shaking dust from my brain to come up w/ another fun way for people to learn about feelings. Said to Patty (my wife), “How about a cool online EQ jeopardy game?”

“Boring” - she said it more delicately. “I mean, what would you ask?” **

Emma (8) is listening in (as usual - big ears!!) and pipes up, “jealousy?”

Right on! “What is jealousy?” I continue to Patty, “Or how about ‘ a little anger + sadness’?” Blank look from Patty, Emma again:

“disappointment?”

Whoa! Emotional literacy in action.

And not enough. Maybe being intelligent about emotions is the foundation. Then the graduate course: to be intelligent with emotions.

** in defense of Patty: her point was that this game has only “right/wrong” answers and our learning philosophy commits us to deeper forms of reflection

Intriguing study - more evidence that being smart with feelings is key to success in life. In this case - recovery from illness.

Those with low anger control produced higher levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which was in turn, associated with delayed healing.

Source: BBC NEWS | Health | Anger control key to recovery

While I’m not crazy about the phrase “anger control” (because “control” is the most superficial form of self-management - kind of like someone saying you should “control your wife”), the concept makes so much sense. Feelings tied to danger (ie, stress response) focus our body on short-term problems (fight the lion).

Likely one reason feelings like hope, courage, and compassion speed healing is that they reverse stress.

@ lunch today confess to eavesdropping (funny word) on 2 young women talking about their lives and decision to make conscious choice about how they want their days to add up into a life.

“I am getting sick of just drinking every day, so I guess I gotta spend my time with different people.”

They got talking about “doing my work” and the healing they both wanted to do.  On the one hand, it sounded like an OD of Dr Phil - every self-help cliche was coming out.  On the other I wanted to go hug them and give them my card.  I thought that might give away the fact that i was eavesdropping though….

And, on the 3rd hand (is there one?) I was wondering about “doing my work.”  I love the commitment to growth.  And I wonder:  Why is it work?

I mean, I get that it is.  Usually it feels like work to change and grow… it’s a real effort to stop doing the crappy-but-gratifying stuff and be a grownup instead (sigh).  But I also feel sad that it’s “work” to learn.

This week’s issue of Newsweek has an article about some fall-out from the ‘happiness movement’. Basically, the argument is that sadness can be a natural response to life events and that negative emotions can be adaptive. Accessing and leveraging the ‘full range of emotions’ should be part of any approach to EI.

Remember that emotions arise from events in our lives, as opposed to moods which are more diffuse and do not always have an external cause. Being down in the dumps, being moody, may not be all that adaptive, but sadness arising from a loss can be. Same with anger and fear.

Lately, I have been thinking about values and EI so I started to re-read some of the earlier writing on the theory. These abilities are to be used to promote emotional growth and development. People high on EI are not masters of the universe, nor do they rise to the top of the corporate heap. They do, however, have stronger and more positive relationships, they communicate more clearly, and they care.