“If one person had opened up and I had heard their story, I would not have suffered so much,” Kessenich says. “And that’s what motivates me to do this work.”

Courtney Kessenich has struggled with anxiety her entire life. As Mrs. DC International, she uses her platform to promote her Hope for Invisible Wounds initiative, which aims to break the stigma around anxiety and inspire others to get the help they need. Kessenich offers herself as an example that, no matter how much someone is suffering, they can overcome.

‘I Thought It Was Normal’

Kessenich started dealing with anxiety following multiple childhood traumas. She lost both of her parents young, and her mom’s death, after a multi-year fight with cancer, hit Kessenich particularly hard. She was just seven when her mom passed away. Her stepmom, instead of proving love, support and stability in the aftermath of her mom’s death, physically and emotionally abused her.  Then, just after grad school, she lost her father to alcoholism and mental illness. This struck her to her core.

“When it started, I couldn’t identify it,” Kessenich says, “I would stay up all night worrying about something at school the next day, or think my friends or teachers were talking about me. I thought it was normal. But when I lost my dad, I had my first panic attack. I ultimately had no choice but to face my illness.”

The scary part about anxiety in general is that it has become normalized – as a lived experience if not yet a topic of conversation. In the United States alone, an estimated 40 million adults suffer from some sort of anxiety disorder. And even though it’s highly treatable, only about 36% seek treatment. One reason: the stigma associated with mental illness. People continue to suffer in silence rather than seeking help. Since getting care and finding healthy coping mechanisms herself, Kessenich has made it her mission to break this vicious cycle.

Just because it works for her, though, she stresses that it doesn’t mean that it will work for everyone. “There is no one-size-fits-all solution,” she says. “My friend loves equine therapy, retreats with horses. For me, that would be a huge trigger because I used to ride horses with my dad. But for her, it’s part of her healing. In addition to spin, diet is also a big part for me. Other people I know swear by meditation, running, or yoga. You have to find what works for you.” Choose Yourself is about realizing you have options and trying them on for size.

But according to Kessenich, nothing has been as transformative as the last part of the Six Seconds Model of EQ, Give Yourself.

Kessenich will be competing for Mrs. International 2019on July 15-21 in Charleston, West Virginia, USA as Mrs. DC International. She’ll be promoting her Hope for Invisible Wounds platform and hopefully, if she wins, receive support to expand her programs worldwide. Good luck, Courtney, and thank you for sharing your story and your amazing work to promote emotional wellbeing!