How to Develop
Emotional
Intelligence

3 Key Emotional
Intelligence Skills

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional intelligence is being smarter with feelings – the capacity to blend thinking and feeling to make optimal decisions.

It’s a learnable, measurable, scientifically validated skillset.

For more, check out What Is Emotional Intelligence?

Start Practicing Emotional Intelligence Today

This free workbook offers tips and strategies to develop your emotional intelligence, from the world’s largest EQ nonprofit.

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Why Develop Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional intelligence is key to having a successful relationship with yourself and others. Numerous studies have linked emotional intelligence to critical life success factors such as better effectiveness, relationships, wellbeing and quality of life.

As shown in the graph, there is an extremely strong, positive relationship between emotional intelligence test scores and success scores. Notice that these variables move together, up to the right. It means that developing the learnable skills of emotional intelligence is, statistically, a sound way to improve scores on success. Also, notice the “empty space” in the top left and bottom-right. It means that if you want to have high success scores, you need EQ.

In countless studies, all over the world, emotional intelligence has been strongly linked to both personal and professional success

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Can You Develop Emotional Intelligence?

Contrary to popular belief, emotional intelligence can be learned and developed. Numerous studies have found EQ to be measurable and learnable – with real impact and results for individuals and organizations. Check out these case studies from all over the world.

If you want to develop emotional intelligence personally – or professionally – where is a good place to start?

The Six Seconds Model of Emotional Intelligence is a great place to start to develop emotional intelligence, whether EQ is a new concept for you or something you’ve studied for years. Here’s a brief overview, and a few activities to get started.

A common misunderstanding about emotional intelligence is that you either have it… or you don’t. In reality it’s a skillset you can both measure and improve.

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The Six Seconds Model of EQ:
3 Emotional Intelligence Skills to Put EQ Theory Into Practice

The Six Seconds Model of Emotional Intelligence consists of 3 main pursuits:

1. To become more aware (noticing what you do)
2. To be more intentional (doing what you mean)
3. To be more purposeful (doing it for a reason)

Start practicing by taking a few seconds, a few times a day, to go through those steps. You can use these three questions:

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1. What am I feeling?

Tune in – Notice your feelings and reactions. Get off autopilot. Tune in to what’s happening inside. Six Seconds calls this step Know Yourself.

These are the 3 steps of the Six Seconds Model of EQ. Learn more here.

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2. What options do I have?

Respond – Instead of reacting, give yourself a moment to de-escalate and evaluate all of your options. Six Seconds calls this Choose Yourself.

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3. What do I really want?

Connect – Remember what’s truly important to you, consider others, and then move forward with those in mind. Six Seconds calls this Give Yourself.